Welcome to GIS Butterfly

GIS- Geographic Information Systems (English)
GIS- Global Information Science (ASL)
Butterfly- A colorful insect that flies from flower to flower pollinating and bring joy to the onlooker.

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Fierce Faith

Alli Worthington's latest book, Fierce Faith, is now available for sale through Amazon and other book sellers. I have enjoyed the opportunity to be on another of Alli's Launch Teams to review this book and encourage her through the weeks entering into her book launch.

Her first book, Breaking Busy, release just two years ago. In Fierce Faith Alli tells of the fears and faith search as she struggled through the Launch of Breaking Busy. Alli is a mom of "5" boys. She is a working mom who knows the struggles of career, family, church, Target, Star Buck's lines...

I followed the Breaking Busy guidelines in my own journey this past few years. My children have all finished Trade Education and University. Two have gotten married and one has made the choice to be a stay and home mom after getting a degree and working at her chosen profession. People tell me, "You did a good job, Mom!" I see that now in retrospect. At the time, I was just powering through as best I could.

Then came the change in my life with divorce after 28 years of marriage. Relocation... Change of Occupation... Change of Church... All the things that had been the constants in my old life as my children were growing up were no long the back drops of the play I was in now. The curtain had gone down on the old life, the crowd had gone home and I was sitting on an empty stage.

New Book

I completed Breaking Busy. I am now into Fierce Faith. A Women's Guide to Fighting Fear, Wrestling Worry, and Overcoming Anxiety. I have been full circle in my counseling sessions. I am back to the point of understand how to live in the present with vulnerability. My counselor suggested a book by Brene` Brown called Daring Greatly. Funny thing is that she also suggested this book when we first met. I got home from here meeting this week and there was the book on the top of my stack of "skimmed over" books. (That is another thing I like about Alli, she fesses up to only skimming books too.)

Fierce Faith is not a book to skim over. It is a book to study and apply page by page. There are printable to put on the fridge and work pages in the back to apply to practice your personal Battle Plan. Correct thinking, personalized Bible Verses and Encouragement from cover to cover that we are not in this battle alone.

This last week I have been trying to figure out what is my back drop for this new Life Action Drama I am in now. I hate the thought that "Drama" just came out of my head and into my figures as I am one to avoid "Drama" at all costs. I am at a stage in my counseling where we have visited the past enough and I need to be shaping the present with hope for the future. I still have nightmares, but I sent the past off crying in my bad dream last night. That is to say, that even in my dream state of mind, I can say, "The past can't hurt me." Now to unravel some more yarn and knit up a new chapter.

I am called "Grammie Butterfly", but this week I felt that I just started coming out of a Chrysalis, of a sort. I'm feeling that I am at the vulnerable state of a Butterfly just coming out with sticky all over and pumping the life fluid up into my wings as the breath of air drys me out before first flight. I had plans this weekend, but a stomach bug kept me home. I cleaned and sorted, threw things away and planned for the next few weeks.

As I told my counselor this week, I feel like there are so many possibilities I would like to try out. They are all opportunities of outside activities. Additional, to my current work at the school and Pier 1 Imports. Creative expression that I would not have attempted if I still had the after school job. I would be stretched too thin. So, now I have Broke Busy. I am headed out with a Fierce Faith to Dare Greatly  in 2018. I hope you can pick up one of these books and come along on the journey with me.


Sunday, December 31, 2017

2017 ~ It's a Wrap

Thankful Ending for 2017

teacher wine glass what's your excuse teacher gift
   2017 has been a journey of lessons. We lost a special Loved One last summer and we got a little bundle of Joy added to the family in March.  Laughter and Tear ~ Joy and Sorrow
   I changed my second job a couple of months ago and have enjoy every minute. I am so thankful for my family and friends that are like family. My co-workers at both jobs are great. My little nest has been snug and warm in cold weather and calm and cool in hot times. 
   I've read a lot of books and painted a few pictures. In 2018 I plan to read more books and paint more pictures. I'm reviewing some of the children's classics like "Secret Garden" in January. First project for the New Year will be reorganizing, at least one book case will come out to the living room.
    In June and July I went on a Sugar Detox. In my blog July first I shared the Jelly Bean thing. This week I realized that just stopping sugar was not the only thing I did on the Detox. I had given up wine for the detox, but did not expect drinking red wine in July after the 21 days would have an effect on my blood sugar. Of course loosing Taylor July 4th didn't help my physical/emotional/mental condition either. In retrospect, when I began drinking wine again my skin started getting red itches patches around my eyes and other places that have tender tissue (arm pits and behind my knees). The doctor was unsure and I was told it was probably an allergy, but just in case I was given an eye antibiotic.
   Six months later and the red itchy has come and gone while I have reduce most sugar. I don't eat wheat and that makes it easy to avoid most of the lovely sweet at Christmas. I did enjoy Dark Chocolate and Red Wine everyday through December... Until two days ago I went to the local Health Food Store. I asked the gal for a suggestion on the itching around my eyes. She asked me if I ate pasta, bread, cookies, cakes, crackers... "No, on all accounts." Then she explained that she had a similar condition that went away when she became Gluten Free. Well, I have been gluten free for nearly a decade, before it was even fashionable. While she was talking to me, my mind kept saying, "Red Wine is sugar". When I reviewed my Sugar Detox File, there it was,"Avoid Red Wine." Whiskey is okay and beer, even white wine, but no red wine. She also suggested EMU OIL. Emu Oil, I didn't know there was such a thing. I got a sample bottle and went home to research. Yes, refined Emu Oil is a great thing for skin and even an anti-fungal. She was telling me that my around the eye itch was a fungal infection. WOW!
Two days later the rash is clearing up and itch was relieved immediately after applying the lotion. Now it is a healing itch. Researchers also say it heals and helps avoid scaring.
   I have got to admit the past few weeks I would look at myself in the morning then be looking at my wrinkled, older customers all day. I had thought, did it hurt like this to get wrinkles. I don't remember seeing anyone else turn all red and itchy as they molted into wrinkles.
    Funny how the mind tries to explain what we feel. In December I got to go on a trip to the North Pole with  Virtual Reality Glasses. I had a little girl in a fluffy coat seated at my knees as I sat in a first grader's chair. When we were looking at the elves at Santa's workshop, she brushed against me and my mind said, "Is there a kitten under the elves work bench?"
   On the Pacific Coastal time we have about 5 1/2 hours until mid-night. Close enough, I will say farewell 2017.

Welcome 2018

   This is my goal for all my readers. I think it is the best New Years Resolution we can hope for in 2018. I have many idea for changes in my life, but I will report on those as they happen. Meanwhile, I pray that you all have a safe and fun New Year's Day.
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Friday, December 22, 2017

Winter has arrived

December 22nd, 2017 you amaze me. 

I'm sitting here in my fuzzy robe singing Feeling Groovy in my head.
...no deeds to do, no promises to keep...
I took most of yesterday off from school for a: Me day. After getting the children safely across to the school as crossing guard: I went to a two hour counseling appointment, got a chair massage in the mall, bought Chinese takeout and took an hour nap
The two hour counseling appointment helped me settle a traumatic situation that has been haunting my dreams for 6 years. "About time," you say. Well, it was the perfect time. It took until now to understand that this was a Ghost of Christmas past and needed to be exercised out of my life. I still cant begin to understand the working of my brain that makes Brain Spotting and EMDR work. However, I know that in the last year I have been able to neutralize the emotionally, crippling events that have made up my past. I have enjoyed happy emotions without guilt.
So many years of my life were ,"One foot in front of the other", "One day at a time". A series of events that happened in December six years ago have given me haunting dreams. Dreams that my head could not get my heart to accept no longer existed. Situations that had no more control on my life. Yesterday, with the help of a Christian Counselor, I was able to laugh at that dream and tell it that it has no control on me. I am free to be loved, trusted, and respected. My experience is that I am loved, trusted and respected, however, my heart is still working on wrapping around what I am experiencing.

No more looking back

I feel I should have turned into a pillar of salt a number of time by now for looking back. I heard somewhere this week that we should look forward and not just stop dwelling on the past problems, but not live in the past glory either. As I complete this last week of 2017, I will be ruminating on that thought. 
It is a Philippians 3:13 thing. I need to press in the present for the future. I could have another 15 to 25 years of quality living left, maybe more, maybe less. I have seen all my children through school, college, university and beginning marriage and parenthood. I am the proudest mother on the planet. I have the most gifted grandchildren. My jobs are fulfilling, I have friends and a nice place to live.
So, as I begin 2018 I will concentrate on the future and what I can leave behind for a better world. A lofty goal perhaps, but an achievable goal as I take it "Step by Step" and "One day at a time."


With this adjusted perspective of myself, I need to say something about friendships in my life. In recent years there has been a lot said about expressing: self-respect, self-love, self-care. With my trust issues, I didn't want to buy into that, "Worthiness" message. It took me six years just to sit down and think about the demon of Christmas 2011, goodness sake, I had another 50 Christmases*** before that one that were not too great either. All I wanted for Christmas was: tights that fit, a cuddle or hug and the words,"You are worthy of love."
This last year I have had a friend who has gone to coffee or to get a beer about 8 times with me. That friend didn't ask anything in return. I have never had a friendship like this, one who respects me, doesn't put me down, and listens when I talk. No agenda. I have learned to trust this friend's point of view and shared my experience in this crazy changing world. No relational debris. Talk about a breath if fresh air.
It is three days before Christmas. I have tights that fit! Yesterday I got lots of hugs from friends, co-workers and parents who have told me in gifts and words that I am loved and worthy. I am blessed.

***History note: The Ancients took the pagan Winter solstice celebration and put a Christian twist on it so that my parent's generation could put a materialistic twist on it all. Outcome: Entitled kids, dressed up, pushed, pulled and told don't expect everything you want, but here is a paper to write down everything you want.

 It's the most wonderful time of the year

I don't want anyone to get me wrong. I love the music, the smells, the food and the lights of the Season. I think it was great of the Ancients to say, "Let's get out of our gloomy huts and enjoying a beer and a fire with the neighbors." I grew up in the 1960's when all the neighbors came by to share snacks. My mom wore a Christmas Apron that defied spills. My dad huffed and puffed about the tree standing upright and my sisters and I shook ever package under the tree. We had snow for Christmas and I love that I live in a place where there is no snow at Christmas to shovel. (It is great to visit, but I walked to school in snow.)
I get to work at Pier 1 on Dec. 23 and 24. I'm excited to see the last minute shoppers run home with their packages.  It is in walking distance and considering the unfortunate fatality last night between home and work, I may walk. (Please pray with me for the families that were touched by that tragedy so close to home. ) 
I have been singing Christmas songs to the crossing children all month at the school crosswalk. This last week I added Reindeer ears/antlers and flashing Lights. My heart is happy with the songs of my youth as I wish you all a Merry Christmas.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

14 School Days until Christmas Break

My New Schedule

On October 30th I began looking for a new afternoon job. On December 1st I got my first check from Pier 1 Imports, my new second employer. After working 50 hours a week at one location, two employers, for over two years I get to leave campus when the sun is still shining. It puts a skip in my step to leave the parking lot while parents are waiting in their vehicles to collect their children. I even beat them to the grocery store occasionally.

I love working at Pier 1. The store is a giant Christmas Village. The customers are most always happy and the glitter is everywhere. All the employees always seems to have a glitter glow. Last night I dusted and swept through the store. My tub had a glitter puddle as I stepped out. 
I wasn't sure how much decorating I would do this year since I work at Santa's workshop during my second job. I started decorating today after mopping the kitchen and washing all the linens. Once I began looking at the boxes of decorations above the washer more came out than I was expecting.
The least I have ever put on the sideboard

A single new ornament and holder, no tree this year 
Cleared the counter, it's real here
 (dishes in the sink)

No front yard Nativity, just my little ceramic

One lonely stocking on the real fireplace mantel 

Traditional repair of a nutcracker

Time to Think

I am working a lot few hours in the hope I will be working more hours this summer. I had not realized how little time I had to just think in my old routine. All my time not working was spent preparing for the next day and researching craft projects to do with the kinders after school. I may have put 50 hours a week on-sight, but easily worked another 10 at home on my computer every week.
Now I have conversations in my head that do not have to do with the kiddos and parents at school. I have been remembering sweet things my own children have said in the past and funny ones too. At my second job I work with a great team that not only want to help the public, they want to help each other. It is great that I have no outside prep needed.

One of the things I have ruminated on a lot lately was how I raised four children, some with learning challenges, to be such amazing adults. No doubt there was a lot of God's grace and prayer as the basis. My attitude toward my children's learning difficulies was not based on labeling the problem as much as just trying different teaching tools for different learning styles. My children were given labels, but not all of those labels can be 100% accurate. You may say, "A child is on the spectrum." Being on the spectrum of autism is a vague ways to describe a child.
Every child will have growing spurts in their physical, emotional and mental development. Being consistent and flexibility were my most used tools. I was consistently trying new things and flexible to understand that not all size 10 shoes have the same comfort level. 
My philosophy from the beginning was: Special Needs kids become quirky adults. Quirky adults are the most interesting people and have the most fun. I came to accept that I am one of those "quirky adults". Growing up, I would have been labeled, "Special needs." My A.C.E. score is on the high level and I would have been in a reading group. We had no "resource specialist." My dyslexia was not discovered until my late teens. By that time I had learned to read and compensate for a world that was upside down and backwards.
Today I can read fast enough, I can write upside down, backwards and use both my left and right hands independently at the same time. I teach reading, because I have compassion and I believe every child can grow. Before my resent "Thinking Time" I had been going through the motions. Now I know why I am doing what I do 180 days a year. I guess that is a little like the "walk by faith, not by sight," part of my life. I don't always get the explanation, but it sure is sweet when I do get to know what I am doing and the why.
Creative and Quirky?

Friday, November 24, 2017

The Day after Thanksgiving

Some call it "Black Friday", others call it "That extra day off after Thanksgiving" and then the children don't have a name for it, but sleeping in until 9:30 was the way my granddaughter: called it.

My Mom passed away June 1986. Most of the "Day after Thanksgiving" are memories of my Mom wrapping packages to be taken to the post office soon. I was the package wrapper from about 1971 on, as my oldest sister left home then. I remember Mom even snuck in my gifts for me to wrap on occasion. I also had a black cat who would get into the wrapping party. It was said that Mom had me wrap everything in sight including the cat.

My life changed in regards to Thanksgiving 4 years ago when Aunt Merna died. She was my children's great aunt and had hosted Thanksgiving all of their lives. The year she died the family did get together at her home for Thanksgiving one last time before her children sold her ranch. Then came a wedding for Abbie, a desolation of my 28 year marriage, another wedding for Johanna and the lost of Ian's sweet lady love.

Three Thanksgivings ago I spent the Thanksgiving break at a monastery to work on my voice and my broken heart. Mission New Clairvaux was rich in history and it was not until I had a new book to review in April 2016 that I found my voice. I was broken; I could not speak of my life in public forum for nearly a year.

Now 2 years after the divorce I spent my Thanksgiving accepting the past, preparing for future and relaxing in the present. I still work 5.5 hours a day at my school each day, but no longer work the extra 4 hours in the afternoon. After two weeks of searching this month I landed a part time job at Pier 1 Imports. They have an amazing Black Friday sale on their Papasans. With my employee discount it was near 1/2 off. So, I may not have always had a restful heart this Thanksgiving, but my body is in luxurious comfort.
My yoga towel was a perfect cover to keep
the plush cushion clean
Many people take this day to collect a tree with their children. I saw that one of my daughters is decorating with her hubby today. (Instgram is a great thing to keep up on my four children.)
I work up until Dec 23rd, so Ian and I have decided the little tree from last year can come decorate the table on Christmas Eve and we will have spiked cocoa on Christmas morning, open a few gifts and go back to bed.
My decorations will include changing the theme of the mantel and changing the door mat insert. Meanwhile, my little Adirondack chairs from Pier 1 and Elf from World Market will be our Christmas decoration. 

My Dad made life size chairs like this, same color 
Dec 1st I put up the Poinsettia garland 
Meanwhile, the boy says he and the dog had a chilly night camping out of doors. It is Nov. 24th you know! I back packed in that area in the middle of summer 1975 for three days, it was cold nights then.

I pray whatever The Day after Thanksgiving is for you, 

May the road rise up to meet you.

May the wind always be at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face,

and rains fall soft upon your fields.

And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Saturday, October 14, 2017

The Hopeful Romantic

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This was the first thing in my Newsfeed this morning.
I said, "Yes, but it is God who makes the magic."
My son who has been through hell and back this year with the lost of his lady love in July... was promoted and given a full time position at the local Fire Academy. He worked hard for this "magic" and he was rewarded for his hard work.

Sometimes, I have not been rewarded for hard work in life. Sometimes, my hard work has not only gone unappreciated, but I have been put down for putting so much work into a project. I always have dusted my self off and heard my grandma in heaven saying, "Well done, good and faithful servant."
As a Christian I am suppose here those words from God, but my Grandma wrote them to me in a note years ago. I was struggling after having done all I could for all the people in my life and felt helpless to change my life. My children were 7, 5, 3-1/2 and 2. I felt I might die from the heart ache in my life of being unloved and working to be everything to everyone. My grandmother sent this letter and those words held me for many years. 
Now those children are adults age: 26, 24, soon to be 23 and 21. All adults and "adulting well". 😃

My current life is busy just with the 50 hour work week I maintain. I wish I didn't have to work so many hours, but at the present time it pays the bills. I don't have any volunteer work and I know a lot of Mom's who work harder than I do. I have Saturday events every other weekend, but they will be paid. This coming week is our Annual School Fall Carnival at school, called the Boulder Bash. (Our school is Boulder Creek Elementary.) That will give me a fun thing to do. I don't go for adult parties, so I can say, "I did Halloween."

I noticed today that the Chakra colors are the same as the colors of the rainbow: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet. We usually look at the rainbow colors top to bottom and the Chakra colors are bottom to top, but if the arc of the rainbow was above a person and the circle arched through the body the red would be at the bottom and violet at the head. Yes, I am a hopeless (hopeful) romantic.
I am not thinking about how to create world peace or save the environment. I spent free time today figuring out how to make a picture showing the rainbow in a circle with a person sitting at the bottom of the picture showing the Chakra colors. Of course, I did four loads of laundry, a load of dishes, grocery shopped for the week and folder enough clothes to outfit my son for two weeks, while solving my Chakra puzzle. 

I listen to my 1960's Folk Rock music, watch the hummingbirds and create whatever my heart desires. My work friends have their ball games, swim meets, and other kids stuff for the weekend. Some of the emptynesters are watching plays, going to concerts and setting at the lake outside their RV's on the weekend. I'm just thankfully, resting in the nest and enjoy the music of my childhood.
The music that says,"I had to say I love you in a song", "Cats in the Cradle", "Nothing from Nothing Means Nothing," and "All the Leaves are Brown and the Sky is Gray".
I found these songs on my Pandora last summer and realized that this is what I am all about. The T.V. and media of the 1960's did shape some of my ideals, but the music is where I truly find my heart. Helen Reddy, "I am Woman hear me Roar." John Denver, "Sunshine on my Shoulders". Simon and Garfunkel, "Bridge over Troubled Waters". These all shape who I feel I am. 
My son was explaining to me the "Hipster" movement. He mentioned something about Bohemian and 60's/70's laid back "All is Groovy". I had to laugh. His father may have kept that part of me subdued while my son was growing up, but now that we have had two years on our own...well, that would me.
The Hopeful Romantic. 🎵Sunshine almost always makes me high...🎵

Sunday, October 8, 2017

October Highs and Lows

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This was the note I took very serious this weekend.
I had a nice coffee date with a friend Saturday morning and rested my soul for the weekend.
Now that it is Sunday evening, my dishes are done, meals planned for a few days and lunches, clothes washed and finished a book with one in the wings to start...

I am in a walking challenge at work and put in my 40 miles before Saturday morning.

Autumn in Redding is my favorite season, but is a fickle lover. We wake in the night to close the window as the temp drops to 50 degrees at night. Then in the afternoon when the temperature hits in the 80s you wish that you packed three sets of clothes for the days activities.
Here are a few of the autumn idioms that came out of my mouth this week:

* This minimum day traffic is like putting toothpaste back in the tube
* The falling leaves of autumn
* Don't judge a book by it's cover
* I love autumn because I am in the "Autumn of my life"
* But fortunately I was not under the weather this last week

Projects to get messy with the kiddos in Kindergarten afterschool program.

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I've had a heart ache like a loose tooth this week. I'm feeling a birthing of a change in this season of falling leaves and chilly nights. I pray it is a graceful change and that kindness and joy are always a part off all things in my life.

~Happy Autumn Breezes